thePIANIST

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

what happened shane? Does this name mark the beginning of my nightmare? Just what happened to you!?
Sheeps have turned to rebel against me. Whatever i do does not prosper anymore. Im finally losing myself into an endless pit. Ive fallen into satan's trap perhaps. Life cant prosper for me. The moment i was born, my fate was decided. I was a monster.. I am a monster...
Fate kept me alive, God saved my life. Am i destineed to just.. live? I have no potential. None that everyone would recognize. I am fake, unworthy. I dont deserve it i should say. Sheeps turining into rebellion, because of my "wicked" ways. Countless times i have inflicted pain unto their heart! This is retribution i guess. The payback for my evil ways. I can never pay it in full. Jesus did it for me. I am useless. Im just a tool. I was never able to lead, satan have decieved me. Everyday i prayed for my sheeps to grow. While everyone fasted for a day, i fasted for three. Im tired really. Ive been but a monster. I tore the hearts of innocent sheeps. Now i know Oh lord, the reason dennis left. It was because of me! My selfishness, my useless and stupid personality. Tell me you didnt call me to be your leader. Tell me so i'd give up! Why should i even be called? I am a monster. Payback time is here huh. Finish it.

I dont mind if i were to lose all my sheeps. Not the title that disturbs me. I dont mind anything at all. No matter what outcome. I cared too much. I should have just did my job. All this may not have happened. Because i wanted them to yearn perfection, i forced things into them. I did things for them, but they never saw it as a sacrificial act. I put my faithfullness into use, my availability to the max, but nothing turned out well. It all turned out to be all wrong. Im done with this.

5:44 PM; The Pianist'

thePIANIST;

Shane from RP class w35a

Loves the piano

Hates rappers

ur hates here

the WISH:

Someone

theCHATTERBOX;

theEXITS;

Angela
Apologetics
Brian
Caryn
Chermaine
Daphne
Desmond Mark
Hongji
Hsueh Ni
Ikekie
Kai Hwee
Michelle (Hope)
Sharmaine
Shepherd
Stephanie
Tiffany
Vivian
Yeshen

thePAST;